OUR LADY OF GUADALUPE – Mexico 2003
It was 2003, and I had had a big awakening by Spirit in 2001 and I was still integrating the changes in my life. I was living in Nevada City, CA with my daughter (19 yrs old) who was soon to be on her own. I wasn’t working and had been living off savings, which now was gone. I was feeling to let go, even more, of my financial and material holdings and step out in Faith. I put my rental property on the market as well as my house. I was slowly, but surely letting go of most other things via garage sales and or just giving things away.
I had received a message (internally) from the Great Divine Mother, in the form of Mother Mary to travel to Mexico City on the Feast Day of Our Lady of Guadalupe, which is December 12th. This was new to me. I don’t speak Spanish much, but I researched the idea and found that there is a big annual celebration at the Basilica of Guadalupe on that day. I enjoyed reading all about Juan Diego and how the story of Our Lady came about. Over a million people come to the city to celebrate. It’s really quite amazing.
My mom’s birthday was also the same day and I felt that I needed to check-in with her (she was in a rest home), to feel ok about going, since I would miss celebrating her birthday, if I did go. She was reluctant at first, but she seemed to understand and we instead spent an extra-special Thanksgiving together.
As I was preparing to go, I was holding garage sales and recently had a very successful one, so I bought a round-trip ticket from Sacramento to Mexico City for about 2 weeks.
I was curious about Mother Mary and who she was in relationship to Our Lady of Guadalupe. So I asked her and she sent me an answer in a dream: “I saw a beautiful image of Our Lady of Guadalupe and while I was looking at it, it turned into a statue and then it harden into clay. While still observing it, the clay eventually cracked open and out stepped Mother Mary!” Awesome to behold!
I was hopeful that prior to making the trip that I would have some money in the bank for the trip. However, that was not really to be the case. I had just $100.17 in my checking account, no savings, plus my round-trip ticket. Two weeks before the departure date, a friend, MM from Mount Shasta, called me up and in the conversation, I mentioned my plans to go to Mexico City for the Feast Day of Our Lady. She called me back later and told me that her guides and Mother Mary encouraged her to go too. I said that would be great; but I told her as far as I knew, this was going to be very basic and probably a challenging trip. I told her of my financial situation and that I felt so strongly about going, that it didn’t matter that I had no money, nor a hotel room to stay in. I told her as far as I knew; I might be sleeping on the church steps. I told her, she was of course, was welcomed to join me, but knowing she is older than myself, I let her know it might not be to her liking.
Again, just prior to departure, MM called again and said she was still planning on coming and that she arranged to be on the same flight as myself going there; but unlike my plans, she would be staying only 7 days.
A few days before leaving, I was having some very uneasy feelings regarding my trip. A lot of fear was coming up about going to a place I’d never been before, in a foreign country and with very little money. Yet, since I felt I was strongly being guided by Mother Mary to do so, I knew I could trust that.
This feeling of transformation and re-birth while going on this journey was very challenging. I even felt to re-write my Will and all my legal papers in case I didn’t come back and even asked my sister to finish raising my daughter, in case I didn’t return. I remember the meeting with my sister vividly. I cried and she cried. We both felt the intense Love energy pour out between us. I had never felt so alone and mystified as to why I felt I was surely going to die and yet, I knew I had to go. My soul was telling me I had to go there. I didn’t share this with my kids or former husband. I didn’t know what to say anyway. It was just a very strong feeling, a knowing. It was something I had to do by myself.
I was also feeling to just really surrender completely to Spirit. I had most everything up for sale already, but maybe to make a final point, before I left, I even put my only car, an SUV up for sale also.
I was guided to go on a ‘fast’ before I left home. I had been fasting on and off for a while before this trip, so that it wasn’t a surprise really. I had no idea what kind of fast or how long I would be doing it; but, it turned out to be what I now call a ‘dry fast’ (no food or water) the whole time I was gone. I boarded the airplane with my small backpack. I brought very little, because I knew I’d have to carry it alone and I wanted to travel as light as possible. I had a few clothes, a CD player, some music, a blanket, an REI water filter and some basic things. I figured, based on what was happening in my life of fasting a lot, I might not need food, but I might need some filtered water.
I met MM in Sacramento and we flew down together to Mexico City. Most all my fears vanished in the eyes of my good friend. She told me that she received a ‘wind-fall’ of some money before she left and she was able to book a hotel room for us for at least a few nights. That was good news to at least have one night in a hotel when we landed. I didn’t know everything I was getting into on this trip, so it seemed wise to take along a special Mother Mary book to read and pray while I was there. In a couple of days, just after I arrived in Mexico City I was feeling lighter and my emotional body was much calmer. I remember MM sitting across from me at a table and telling me that she could see this huge ‘V-shaped, ladder-like, light formation from my shoulders to way above my head. She said: “Hey, it’s the Jacob’s Ladder! And it is all around and above you!” This was new to me, I didn’t know what a Jacob’s Ladder was, but I felt good and was happy that she saw it and was very excited about it. For me, I just felt comforted by a ‘knowing’ that I had actually come and showed up, it was Day 2 of my fast.
( Mary Ma McChrist, The Blessed Mother’s Blue Rose of the Healing Heart book.)
There was excitement in the hotel and in the city and I could feel it. We were both guided by Spirit (Mother Mary and Jesus in particular) to bless each other and imagine a wonderful Light shield around ourselves of protection. We downloaded the book I brought into our auric fields as an extra connection/ protection and called in the Archangels also, especially AA Michael. We knew we were held in a state of grace and it felt good. The next morning we left the hotel and took a taxi to arrive at the Basilica.
The days flew by. I fasted on nothing or sometimes a sip of water. But, sometimes I felt that even a sip of water was bringing my vibration down. Before I left home, I recorded Andre Bocelli’s, ‘Ava Maria’, over and over again on the same CD and brought that and my single disc CD player. I loved listening to the music! I figured that at least if I had the Ave Maria song to listen too, when I was afraid, it would comfort me and I could relax and remember all would be ok.
The days flew by. We were both very busy with Spirit individually and together. Mostly only at night were we together. It was an amazing journey of a pilgrimage, in faith and miracles. So many people, music, altars, families, prayer, mass, walking, singing and many cultural experiences were happening all around us.
One night in the evening with MM, we had a visit by some etheric space beings. They came in very loud and clear telepathically, to MM. She is more use to verbal channeling than I am, she gets the ‘details’ of conversations and would then share their questions with me. Eventually, when MM sounded concern about the information she was getting, I simply said: “Hey, why don’t you just refer them to the Spiritual Hierarchy?” Call in your favorite Masters and Saints, or better yet, ask your Spirit who you should refer them to. MM sounded relieved that she didn’t have to be the one to answer all their questions.
It was fun though. They had asked her, “If the people on Earth could see who she really was?” She answered, “No”. She also said that it was easier that way, because it gave her the freedom to move around, incognito on the planet to do her work. They commented that I (Your sister-father, they called me) in the next bed was pretty funny. Ha, ha. Yes, Divine Father’s energy was running through me as MM was holding the Divine Feminine. We found that these space beings were inquisitive about Earth and our role here. They asked MM, “Why they shouldn’t just go ahead and destroy Earth?” That troubled her a lot. They said there was a lot of dark energy on our planet and it was bothering the rest of the universe. Again, I mentioned to MM in a calm, detached way, to just refer them to Masters of the Higher Realms to explain more fully the purpose of Earth and the people here. After saying that, I felt a strong energy in me! I shifted completely to my ‘Higher Self’ and I found myself giving the ‘whole picture’ download of information to them. I could feel, see and knew that I was giving them a multi-dimensional, full living-color and knowing movie of ‘Classroom Planet Earth’, who we are and why we choose to be here. Great fun really!
I remember the night of the Feast Day was very special. I had been fasting for days now “Living on Loving Light’, I called it and we had had a full day at the Basilica and we had just returned to the hotel. I had already been working with Jesus for a long time now lifting souls and as usual, as soon as I had closed my eyes, there were zillions and zillions of souls (I saw them as very compacted faces together) hanging out in my auric field and in the etheric. I could feel Our Lady of Guadalupe in contact with me. My heart was so filled with love! In the past, I had made ‘The Call’ to lift Souls by greater and greater numbers, but this amount was the largest yet. As I already knew, I really don’t do the work; I simply make ‘the call’. I continued to telepath with Our Lady of Guadalupe and could feel the Love energy well-up inside of me and especially my heart! She took my consciousness further back into Source and then I could clearly see this huge etheric darkish astral realm that was encircling the Earth. It was tight, squished together, very overcrowded. She showed me how, now, we were lifting this huge, grey energy bubble that was surrounding the Earth up and out to be much more expansive, lighter and brighter! It was so beautiful to perceive! Ah, the joy! Ah, the love! There is nothing like working with the Saints, Sages and Masters!
I telepathed my questions to Our Lady and was wondering what this was about and how come so many souls were involved. I received an answer that told me that we were taking an old perception of ‘Heaven, Hell and Purgatory’ and shifting it to a new ‘Heaven on Earth’ perception of Love and Light. So now, that ‘Heaven’ is much more expanded in consciousness and they can now evolve much more quickly and fully. I had also asked: “Why here, why now?” She told me, as did Jesus did previously, that when there is a celebration on Earth that honors the Divine (Mother or Father), there is then extra-dispensation granted and she is able to use the extra Love, Light and Faith of the people to do very important work, including having the power to lift Souls into the higher realms which, was so very needed.
I and MM and went to the pyramids near Mexico City at Teotihuacan. It was fantastic! Our psychic abilities were very strong. I connected with the Lord of Time, I know as Pacal/Quetzalcoatl, especially as I stood at the top of the pyramid of the Sun. We both re-experienced our former lives as high-priestess at the pyramids, especially the Pyramid of the Moon. There was a moment when I was standing on the peak of the Pyramid of the Sun and I could feel the Divine come into my body. I could feel a very focused energy go out of my eyes into the distance. Its was powerful! I asked Spirit what we were doing and I got: “We just reset time”. Wow!
After a week, MM had to depart back to California and I knew I still had another week to stay in Mexico. She indicated that she needed to go to the bank before she left. We found out where one was and went into it. MM went into the line to talk to the teller and I was guided to stand in a corner, in the reception area and wait. While I was standing there, a great energy encompassed my being. It felt wonderful. I felt like I was being lifted to the higher realms while standing there in the bank’s lobby. It lasted quite a while. In the meantime, MM was in line and the line was not moving; in fact, more and more people were coming in the door and the line was quite long and going out the door. All I know, is that I’m was held in Grace and felt good. Slowly, but surely the energy starts to dissipate and the bank line starts to move. I can see and feel MM and the customer’s agitation. I then received a ‘knowing’, that the Divine Mother had just ‘reset the banking system of Mexico!’ Awesome!
( I though, whatever that meant, it’s just the words that I heard.)
As I said goodbye to my friend and she left, all I could do was turn to Spirit and ask: “Now what God? Where do you want to go?” With that, I got information to go to Oaxaca. “Ok”, I’m thinking inside, but I don’t have any idea where it is and I’ll need money. Nearby, I found an ATM and withdraw $100 from the $100.17 that it says I have in my checking account. I have no place that I know of, to stay once I get there. I’ve been fasting about 8 days now, I don’t seem to be in fear and I am feeling the closeness of God in me on this journey. Trust and Faith is all I have to go on now. I don’t speak the language or really know much about where I am going, nor why. At the bus station, my spirit has me notice a particular young man, about my son’s age and we strike up a conversation easily and it turns out we are headed to the same place. He appears to be American and speaks some Spanish (so I am feeling better).
After a long bus ride, we arrive and it’s was late at night. My new found friend says he is headed to a hostel in Oaxaca and I am welcome to share a taxi ride with him and two others and maybe there is a room there for me, if I’m interested. Perfect! I’m definitely interested! God is in-charge, yes! When I arrive, I am able to get an inexpensive room at the hostel. I was exhausted and simply go to bed to find myself going through a very intense transformation almost all night. I found it interesting to experience my consciousness shifting so much while I was in the body in a light sleep. It went on for hours, all night and yet I know I am being blessed by God. Eventually, I sleep until daybreak. During the night I heard some popping sounds and I wondered if perhaps it was a Mexican holiday or celebration and there were firecrackers going off. I was in a high-state of consciousness during this integration, so I wasn’t aware of a lot of physical activities others were doing at the hostel during the night, except as young people do, partying. As I awake in the morning, I just knew to get going and I asked God: “Where to now?”
I found myself wandering into a new area in the city. It was a warm day and my backpack was feeling very heavy. Eventually, I found a really neat old-fashion, stone church. It was huge. I love being around churches because of the energy there. I went inside to see the statues. It was a Catholic church. After meditating and praying for a bit, I left and was guided to stay in a nearby hotel. I was surprised. It was a fancy place, all made out of stone with thick walls, a beautiful, old fashion plaza in front and lovely garden on the side…very nice, very fancy for my budget and I asked Spirit: “Really? Stay here?” I definitely got a “Yes!” Ok, I felt that God wanted me to, without regard to cost, stay here so truly, I would be surrendering to God completely once again, Trust.
I went inside the hotel and got a wonderful room. Outside one of the sides of my room was the main marketplace courtyard. The room was very nice and large. It felt good. I could even wash out some of my clothes now (which was a very good thing) and hopefully they would dry overnight. Since I had a room, I could now leave my backpack and do some more wandering around the town. I had to use a lot of discipline not to eat or drink anything. Drinking even water would make me hungry, so I didn’t. I was guided to go ahead and purchase a Mexican cape, a serape, with the idea that I would blend in better with the locals.
I noticed as it was getting late, around 5 p.m. or so, that more and more police personnel were showing up. I couldn’t see any trouble in the area, so I didn’t know what that was about. Pretty soon, not only were a lot of police arriving, but they had these huge Plexiglas shields that they were holding. Then I realized that they were like a SWAT team. I decided to leave the courtyard then and return to the hotel to talk to the clerk to find out what was happening. When I got to the desk, the clerk was highly excited. He was quickly taking everything off the counters and shoving papers and everything into the drawers. I asked: “Hey, can you tell me what is going on outside with all the police?” He very quickly, in his broken English said: “Big show-down of police and drug cartel tonight! Very dangerous! We close the outside doors to the hotel at 7pm tonight. No one gets in and no one gets out. So be sure you are in your room!” I then asked: “Will I be safe in my room?” He said: “You should be, as long as no one opens the front door!” I ask if he is going to be in the hotel during the night and he just looks at me didn’t answer. Ugh! I thought.
I then noticed how the walls of the hotel were made of very thick stone, so there was a good reason that Spirit had suggested I spend the night here. It’s a really old, stone building, like a fortress, I noticed. The front door is thick, thick wood too, much like doors on a drawbridge, so there should be no problems with anyone easily breaking in. He then returned to his project of quickly clearing the desk of any items and I felt he couldn’t be done too soon to get out of there. “Oh great!” I thought. So, it was gun-fire I was hearing the night before, not fireworks! So God has put me here in the midst of this potentially dangerous chaos…for some reason?
Well, it was getting dark soon and I thought, “Why wait until 7 o’clock? How about now?! Yes!” As returned to my room, I took note of the architecture and indeed the smallish, long rectangular window space, that faced the courtyard opened up to the air, had no glass, but it was very high up. I realized how God was protecting me, by having me stay here. It was a very old and well built hotel next to the stone church and the walls were made of thick stone, probably both built around the same time, so I should be ok I thought, as long as, ‘No one opens the front door!’, as the clerk emphatically stated!
I decided to rinse out some clothes now, in hope that they might dry overnight. To me the room was beautiful! It had a nice double bed and was a pleasant, Spanish style décor. After spending most of day and part of the night on the bus yesterday, it would be a real treat to sleep in the bed, I thought. Spirit/Mother Mary came in telepathically and guided me now to say the Ascension Rosary. That was a good idea for me anyway, because it always calms me down and brings me peace.
As it got later and later, I kept saying the Ascension Rosary over and over. I was starting to hear commotion outside here and there too; but most of it sounded far away. However, as it got later and later, the yelling, running and gunfire started to get closer. A couple of times I thought about lying down on the bed and perhaps sleeping, but I felt it was important to stay up and keep praying. I then felt to read and do all the prayers in the book I had brought : The Blessed Mother’s Blue Rose of the Healing Heart. As I am reading the book (again) and saying the different rosaries, the gunfire really began in earnest! Now the violence was right outside my window and the front door. The yelling, screaming and gunfire grew louder and more active now and throughout the night. The more it was happening around me, the more I just continued to pray, all through the night and tried to remain calm. There was one point when there was rapid gunfire, screaming and a woman came to the big front door from the outside and was pounding on it, screaming: “Let me in! Let me in! My friend has be shot! I need to get him to safety! Let me in! Open the door!” It was so hard for me to hear this and not help. She continued to do this several times; but, I also knew that I couldn’t open the door. No one could see through to the other side anyway to know who was really there; but, if I opened the door, I would jeopardize all the guests in the hotel too.
Probably about 5 a.m. all the commotion outside quieted down. I hadn’t slept a wink. But, I did start to relax and think about sleeping, when Spirit and my Guides came through and asked me what I thought about going further east to the Yucatan Peninsula? Oh my God! What a decision that would be! As far as I knew I had no money left in my checking account. I didn’t even know how I was going to get back to Mexico City, or if I was would make my return flight as it was. I had no idea where I was going, except I knew the Yucatan was further east and it was the opposite direction of going ‘home’, as I knew it. If I did choose to go clear to the eastern side of Mexico, that would mean I would be forfeiting my return ticket from Mexico City to Sacramento, and certainly not to return by Christmas. “Or, maybe I really am not going to return?” As I faced this possible reality (Spirit doesn’t hide anything from you as you make these decisions, so I was shown all the possible outcomes of my decision.) I then question myself: “Am I able to exercise Faith and Trust to that degree of surrender with Spirit?”
As I pondered the question, I was filled with a lot of love. I started to cry and cry. I was so tense from staying up all night (again), fasting, exhausted, etc., so it felt really good to let it all go into the loving hands of Spirit. All my fears came up. Every imaginable scenario of my worst nightmares came up. “How can I leave my family, my daughter and my son? And yet, how could I say no? I am talking to God… Jesus and Mary are in me and asking me to go. How can I say no?” I couldn’t. I was up all night saying prayers, the rosary, mantras and crying. I was rung out. All my resistance was gone. I hadn’t eaten or drunken anything for 10 days, not much sleep and now I was completely in surrender to God. I sort of felt like a zombie and yet, held in peace. “Yes, of course. There is no other choice really”, I said in my mind. I already knew that God, Spirit, the Masters, my guides and angels meant everything to me. Without them and following their guidance I would be all alone and not coming to do what I planned to do as my Soul agreement.
Deciding I would go, shifted me. Once the decision was made I seemed to have a surge of energy. All was the Love and Light of God! I was very happy and peaceful now. I made the decision and I was ok, happy even. I wasn’t tired or worried at all now.
As I prepared to leave my hotel room, I looked back at the lovely accommodations and the bed, the bed I never got to sleep in. Oh well, I thought, another time then…
Getting practical, I knew I had to find another ATM and see if there was money in my checking account to buy a bus ticket to Cancun. As I found one, I noticed my account said there was still $100.17! Yea! So, I again pulled $100 out of the account and bought an all-night travel bus ticket to Cancun, the furthest eastern point that the bus company was running. I enjoyed walking around the city, waiting until my bus departure time. In spite of the drama during the night, the people were busy once again setting up their sales tables and cottage crafts, kids playing and laughing, birds singing, the sun was shining and I had time to revisit the big, old stone church again and enjoy the peaceful silence for a while; it was like nothing even happened last night in the streets at all.
The bus trip was easy at first, everything was going very smoothly and I felt fine. But, then there were times (I was tested you might say); when I was hungry and thirsty, but I was able to stand firm in my truth when the bus stopped at the snack-bathroom places along the way and not get anything. Eventually, in early morning, right at sunrise, the bus arrived in Cancun. A few months prior, I had a conversation with a friend of mine in Nevada City, CA and she told me of a magical-spiritual place right off the coast of Cancun. It was an island called: ‘Isla de Mujeres’ (the Island of the Women) and to me in this moment, it seem like the right place to go.
( That God’s Love and Light really runs the body; not just physical food.)
I found out that there were ferry rides from Cancun to Isla de Mujeres daily. I also found out I could take the ‘fast’ ferry for 28 pesos; or the ‘slow’ ferry for 18 pesos. I had 30 pesos with me. I figured, “Hey, I’ve got all the time in the world. (I have no idea where I’m going.) No need to rush! Plus, I can save money by taking the slow ferry”. I thought I followed the right signs to get in line for the slow ferry. As I sat on the ferry I felt good. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, it was still early morning and the temperature perfect. After a bit, the lady who worked there started announcing something in Spanish that I didn’t understand. Eventually, it got translated and what she was saying was that the boat was being purposefully delayed because they were waiting for someone who was running late. That was ok with me. I felt I had all the time in the world. Pretty soon a man came on board with a large tray of fresh baked pastries. It was explained to me, that he has a restaurant on the island and every morning he makes a run to the bakery on Cancun and brings fresh bake goods back to the restaurant. As it turned out, he sat right in front of me with the tray of pastries right under my nose. (Spirit was teasing me?) If that wasn’t enough, he then turned around and faced me and in his Spanish-English he gave me a personal invitation to come and see him at his restaurant any time and he would treat me to a meal. He was laughing during all this. I smiled and said thank you, knowing all along I was choosing to stay committed to my fast. Spirit sure has a sense of humor! Ha, ha. I love the Mexican people, they are usually so warm and friendly natured, to me.
They then started to collect the money after everyone was on-board, so it was a bit of a surprise when they said 28 pesos, please. Apparently I got on the fast ferry instead. Ok, so now all I had left with me was 2 pesos. Well what was I going to do with 2 or 12 pesos anyway?
As we arrived, I got off the boat and started to walk around the island, checking in with Spirit about where to go. I was also trying to remember what my friend said about the island and where the special place was located. I asked around, but just wasn’t finding it. Pretty soon, two young kids were coming my way and asking for money. So of course I decided to just give them my last 2 pesos. It made them happy. However, about then I was feeling anger: “Fine!” I said to Spirit. “Just fine! You got me where you want me. No money, no food, no water! Just fine!” My temper outbreak didn’t last long, especially as I kept walking around and started to notice this new place and enjoying the quaint town and nature all around me.
After some more time, my backpack was starting to feel very, very heavy as I walked some more. Up ahead I saw a trash can and I thought that that would be a good place to leave things I didn’t really need. People might know to take these things and put them to good use, as I was making a mental list in my head of what to let go of. Although, up to that point, I thought everything I had was important; which it was, unless you have to carry it! I then went through my belongings and decided to let go of a few things, including the very expensive REI water filter I bought. “What the heck”, I thought, “I’m not drinking water anyway!” (feeling angry and sorry for myself).
Eventually, as I continued to walk and explore the island, I was getting tired and it was getting dark. It had been a fun and interesting day. I did find someone to ask about the sacred place; but, I found out it was now part of a golf-course and it looked like I had to buy a ticket to get in and I had no money. As I wandered along the road and talked to God and did prayer to Mother Mary, eventually I was aware that Spirit wanted me to notice a place on the other side of the fence, that I could probably go to and sleep under the trees and not be noticed. This was new to me. I formerly had a traditional life-style and had never trespassed onto someone else’s property, cross over a barbed wire fence, nor just slept with a blanket on the ground before. However, I was too tired to object and/or held in a state of grace to a place of surrender. What else was I going to do? Just sit down in the middle of the road? I was too exhausted to protest, so I just hopped the fence and found a spot to lie down on my blanket. As I laid there, I looked around me in this lovely forest and all I felt was gratitude.
It was a powerful night and I had a lot of vivid dreams. I remember waking up near morning and talking to Jesus. I remember feeling so grateful! He had come to me in my dream-time. I was caught inside what I call a nightmare-dream-loop! I couldn’t get out! I was there for many, many eons of time! It was a nightmare and I was caught in it and I couldn’t get out. I remember he gave me the Key Codes: 4444! I’ll never forget them! I kept saying them over and over and over! My heart was exploding with gratitude for his Love and Light and for him saving me! I’ll never forget and I’ll always be grateful!!! Thank you Jesus! I kept saying this over and over: “Thank you Jesus! Thank you Jesus! Thank you Jesus!” Words are not enough for the gratitude I was feeling and still feel.
( My theory on this was that I left a part of my consciousness from another time space reality in this nightmare time loop and only Jesus/Mary incredible love and light helping me salvaged the lost part of my consciousness back into wholeness in me now.)
That morning I also noticed, much to my dismay, that I started my period. “Oh my, what a mess! What else? Ok, time to pull it together”, I thought. Lucky for me, it was very early morning and Spirit had me realized that the Caribbean Sea (such a beautiful color!) was right below me, down the cliff on the left side that I didn’t even know was there in the dark. Thank God! A place to wash up before the fishermen came out and I might be noticed. So I carefully slid down to the water and all was well and very refreshing!
I decided to stay in my little forest spot for a while. (I thought, ‘forever?’) I was happy to rest and not do anything all day; since I was still not eating nor drinking anything for 12 days now. My second morning on the island in the same spot, I woke up and a huge spider was on my blanket over my leg. The amazing thing for me, was that I was just looking at it and it was just looking at me. I wasn’t afraid at all. I just thought it was interesting. Eventually it just left.
Most of the time in my forest spot, I didn’t do much. I rested and slept having interesting dreams. Finally on morning of the third day, Mother Mary woke me up and told me it was time to go into town. I really didn’t want to go. I felt that she was letting me know that I really had to go, or someone would be coming by and would find me. “Ok, then”, I was very sensitive to energy and everyone’s thoughts and had to follow guidance because God is in-charge and that was all I could trust. I was very afraid of anyone getting angry at me, especially because I didn’t know the area; I was alone and didn’t speak the language.
Slowly, but surely, I started walking back to the island town. All was well and I was enjoying my walk. But at some point, I had to go to the bathroom! (Go figure! When God wants something to happen, it does). I looked around and noticed that I had just passed a restaurant and saw a bathroom, it was early morning yet and they still hadn’t opened, but a saw an older Mexican woman working there. So I walked back to where the woman was and I asked (using sort of an English-Spanish-hand-signal language) if I could use the bathroom (urgently!) She said it would cost 5 dineros. I indicated that I didn’t have any money, but she didn’t seem to believe me, or care or both and she motioned at me to leave in disgust.
I didn’t know what to do; I really had to go, so I said a prayer to Mother Mary and asked her help. As I walked away, and was about 20 feet from the restaurant, the lady must have changed her mind and yelled after me that it would be ok after all. “Senora! Its ok, come back and use the banos”. Ah, the feeling of gratitude! I returned to the restaurant and went in to use the bathroom and was glad I did. While I was in the bathroom, I started hearing the traditional version of the song of ‘Ave Maria’! That was amazing! Here I am in a very tiny, rural town on this small island and this woman is now playing the Ave Maria! Amazing synchronicity I thought!
I then had an idea. After I finished in the bathroom, I went out front to get the woman’s attention and let her know, that I too had the ‘Ave Maria’ on a CD, but a different version sung by Andre Bocelli. I wanted to share it with her. I was thinking, what would be the chances that she would ever hear this version of the Ave Maria sung by Bocelli in her lifetime? I pulled out my fairly new CD player with the disk and started to play it. She loved it! We stood there for the longest time, us both listening to the music for a couple of rounds. Ah! How it filled our hearts! I then knew I wanted to gift her the CD. I also looked up at her old CD player in the corner of the cafe and thought: “She needs a new CD player too; the one she has might not even work and certainly would scratch this CD.
It was one of my most joyful moments to present her with these gifts and to then to just walk away. I was so happy. The ‘Ava Maria’ CD got me through many days and weeks of uncertainty, sadness and fear. It was my security blanket of sorts and yet nothing compared to the joy I felt of giving it away and making someone so very happy!
As I continued into town, I was getting tired. It was a 5 mile walk with a backpack and I had been fasting without food or water for 13 days now. I arrived in the main part of town just in time to notice that it was going to rain. “Help! Where now God-spirit?” I was wondering. I was then shown a few places and none really looked good. I did pass a camping area, but I had neither a tent nor money for that situation. Finally, I noticed a hotel was being remodeled and looked vacant. I also noticed later that Spirit had given me an opportunity to ask permission to go inside one of the rooms from a hotel person, but I was feeling very shy and a bit afraid and decided to just go into a room (it was missing a door) and see if I even wanted to stay. The place was filled with dry-wall dust. There was a sink with a working faucet which was nice. But, I was so, so tired, I just wanted to sleep. I cleared a space off of the bed (it was covered with plastic, trash and dust) and put down my blanket to close my eyes for a while. At some point, it had turned to nighttime and I had fallen asleep, deeply, only to be woken by a man standing in the doorway yelling at me! I was so scared! I don’t speak Spanish and I didn’t know why he was so angry. I had a hard time remembering even where I was. The room was still dark. A thunder and lightning storm was indeed occurring. The man in the doorway (there was no door), was backlit by the lightning strikes happening behind him. He looked quite frightening as I was not fully awake when he surprised me. I just kept saying : “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”
Finally, he stopped yelling and perhaps realized I didn’t speak Spanish and I wasn’t a threat so he calmed down and started speaking English. He tried the light switch and the lights came on, almost blinding me. He then said it was ok that I was there and I could even stay there for the night. I said ok and thank you; but after he left, I decided I didn’t feel safe being there alone. Anyway, I decided to quickly pack my bag and get going. Somehow I feel safer in nature, not potentially trapped; so even though it was dark and late at night (midnight?), I stepped out with my poncho on and walked along the beach for a long time. The rain seemed to come and go and not many people were out and about. Eventually, it looked like I found a good spot near some sand-dunes and I could kind-of hide out with my blanket wrapped around me. I laid down for a while with my blanket, but pretty soon I was itching like crazy. It turned out that this part of the beach was loaded with sand fleas! They were everywhere! I had to get out of there, fast!
I wandered some more and eventually came to a groomed part of the beach which then looked like it might be part of a resort. They had beach lounges everywhere, which would be nice to lie on, so the sand fleas couldn’t get to me as easily. I found a nice spot near a cabana, which I decided was good because if it did rain, there was a ledge I could tuck myself under, as to not get too wet. I was sitting on a lounge chair, when a very drunk man came over to talk. He was a guest at the hotel. He told me he had been visiting the Mayan Ruins and the pyramid of Chichen Itza on the Yucatan Peninsula. He was Mexican scholar, and spoke very good English. He talked for a very long time, many hours and was very drunk. He wanted me to go with him to his hotel room, but I said, “No thanks.” He kept talking into the wee hours and finally left. I was very tired and it was very late and I just wanted to go to sleep. I had no watch or anything, but was probably about 2 or 3 o’clock in the morning. I decided to remain on the lounge and try to sleep. But shortly thereafter, I was suddenly awakened with a very bright flashlight shinning in my face and again an angry man yelling at me in Spanish! I couldn’t understand him, I just knew he was mad and maybe I did something wrong. Eventually, I think he noticed I was perhaps an American. I tried to let him know I didn’t speak Spanish. He pointed to the sign, which must have said that this area was for hotel guest only? All I could think to do was say: “I’m sorry” over and over and then make moves to leave.
God has a heart though and as I got up to get my stuff, he must of reconsidered and then said, in broken English/Spanish, that it would be ok for me to stay until morning, but not too late in the morning. He then left. Ahhh…. Good then! I felt ok with this situation, unlike in the hotel room, so I tried to relax and get back to sleep.
But about then, it started to rain. Darn. I got up with my bag and blanket as quick as I could manage before everything was soaked and curled up under the overhang of the cabana (only a 1 ½ foot ledge). At least it was some shelter from the rain, I thought. I don’t know when, but I must have slept some of the time during the night, because when I woke up it was now early morning. I felt rested and God blessed me with two watch dogs. I had a black-colored lab dog on the right and a white-colored lab dog on the left, both sleeping next to me. Where did they come from? When did they come? I had no idea. But they were side-by-side of me while I slept a little. Perfectly, big watch dogs that protected me. Then I humorously thought, “Dog spelled backwards is God!” Thank you God!
Eventually, I got up. It was probably about 6-7 a.m. I was a bit stiff. It was a beautiful, clear day. The storm had passed and as I looked around, everything was sparkling clean, clear and the air was fresh! Nearby was a boardwalk by the beach, it looked very inviting to walk around. I was feeling fine. After a little walking and stretching I paused at the end of the boardwalk with a completely blank mind and clearly felt Mother Mary came in. I could sort of see her too, as well as hear; “It’s time to go home now”. “What?” I thought. What? Home? Home? Where is home? I don’t understand. Home? I remember it took the longest time for my memories to return. Home. Slowly, but surely, I started to remember that ‘home’ meant Nevada City, California. Oh yes! I have a house there, a daughter, a whole other world away. It seemed like a vague, distant memory. Eventually, the thought came to me about Christmas! Oh my! I wonder if I’ve missed Christmas? Memories and thoughts were returning quickly to me. Wow! Home! I really don’t know how to feel about that, it seems so far away, in a different place and time.
To get back, I thought, I’d have to have some money for transportation. I’m hoping that somehow there is some money in my checking account too. Almost right away, I found an ATM and it worked for my card! The ATM said I still had $100.17 in my checking account. Amazing! I withdrew $100, again. I bought another boat ticket for the trip from Isla de Mujeres to Cancun. When I arrived in Cancun, I then went to the bus station and found I had just enough money to buy an all-night bus ticket to Mexico City plus a small bottle of water. Again, I mostly stayed up all night during the drive back to Mexico City, I just didn’t seem tired.
I arrived in Mexico City at the airport on Christmas Eve about 8 pm. I went to the Airline’s ticket counter, only to find it was all empty! The whole airport was mostly empty; but eventually, as I walked around, I heard some voices. I met a woman and spoke about my situation in trying to find someone who might work at the airline which I had an old ticket. She suggested that I go back to that section of the airport and go upstairs. She said that sometimes the management works later than the staff and someone might still be there.
As walked the long walk back to that particular area; indeed, I could hear people talking on the upper level. I climbed up the stairs and found myself outside an office where a man, who was behind the desk, was talking to a lady. She was leaving for the night and he was saying: “Merry Christmas!” As she left, while opening the door, the man could see me and invited me into his office.
I looked at his big desk and nameplate which had his name: “Jesus”. Inside I smiled. He asked me how he could help me. I explained the situation of how I missed my previous return flight to Sacramento and I wanted to find out what it would take for me to get on another flight, soon. (I was, of course, hoping to return maybe by tomorrow, Christmas?). He was a nice-looking man, who was casually dressed; I had no idea who he was, nor what he did. He looked at me, then smiled and then broke into a great laugh! He just kept laughing for a while. And I’m thinking: “What’s up?” He then proceeds to let me know that flights on Christmas Day are sometimes booked a year in advance! He said all the flights, especially tomorrow are all full and there is a very long waiting list! Ha, ha, ha… his laughter was just saying: “You’ve got to be kidding!”. But I wasn’t. I was sort of just held by Spirit, wanting a flight, but not overly focused on the outcome, nor the timing really.
As we spent more time together, we then started having a more relaxed conversation about Christmas and family. He laughed too when he found out my name was Mary, as I handed him my old ticket. He then got a bit more serious and said: “Look, there are 3 flights tomorrow: 6 a.m., 8 a.m. and noon. Your best bet for standby would be the 6 a.m. flight, but you need to be here by 3 a.m. to have a chance to get on-board. I’ll see what I can do, but really don’t count on it.” After all I had been through, being at the airport at 3 a.m. was no problem, I had nowhere to go anyway.
He then said: “By the way, there is a $100 charge for changing your flight, so I will need to collect that money from you now to even get you into the computer for the standby list.” He told me where there was an ATM machine nearby. He said though it was late and Christmas Eve, he would wait for me to get the money, so he could get me on the standby list tonight.
I left his office and went downstairs as he directed me to the ATM machine. I stood there and said a prayer to God, Jesus, Mary and all the Divine to help me. My card worked with this machine which was a great step in the right direction and though this machine didn’t show my balance, it was ok with letting me withdraw a $100.00. I then went back upstairs. I didn’t feel the need to question what was happening with my checking account, I was just feeling grateful!
As I returned to Jesus’ office, he was waiting. I handed him the money and he handed me a piece of paper regarding the flight details we talked about. He again told me not to get my hopes up, because it was probably hopeless. Also, he said, he had checked the price of the new ticket on Christmas Day as opposed to the old ticket and there was a price difference of about $90.00 and I would need to have that amount ready to pay tomorrow, if for some miraculous reason a seat opened up on one of the flights (ha, ha, slight chance of that I felt him think). I said that would be fine (hoping in the back of my mind that I hope my magic checking account keeps coming through and somehow this all works out!). All I could think to say was: ‘Thank you’ many times. For his willingness to try, for staying late on Christmas Eve (it was almost midnight now) when everyone else was gone to enjoy their Christmas at home, for being so nice, understanding and helpful.
We then said, “Goodbye” and “Merry Christmas!” and then I left to go downstairs not to keep him any longer. It seemed that no one else was working anywhere around. God bless! For I sure was!
As I’m descending the stairs, I’m thinking, that was really special. ‘Jesus’ and ‘Mary’ making plans on Christmas Eve to try to get me back to Sacramento on Christmas Day. Hmm…
I’m also thinking, that if I don’t have the money tomorrow, this is all for naught. Since the ATM is still nearby, I decided to go ahead and see if I could get the money tonight, especially since everything is going to happen so early in the morning. Again, it was amazing, the machine let me withdraw another $100.00! Awesome!
The next thing I thought about was calling my daughter to put her on alert that I might be coming home tomorrow. I hadn’t talked to her the whole time I was gone. I had no idea what she might be thinking. I had an International Calling Card, but no chance to use it until now. My hope was that she could drive my car from Nevada City to the Sacramento airport to pick me up, but I didn’t know if I’d even be on a flight, nor what time. Though I wasn’t able to reach her by phone, I could leave a message and hope she would listen to it in time. One concern was that she had just learned to drive and it was only in a small town, just local traffic. Navigating the big city freeways in Sacramento and the airport was another issue. I addressed that also; so she might be able to get someone to help drive and all would be ok. I let her know I’d call her again, if and when, I made my flight, so she would know when to come and get me (it’s an hour and a half drive from the house to the airport there).
I also had been wondering about my checking account too and how it seems to have money or at least the original balance doesn’t seem to diminish. I did remember that when I left Nevada City, I asked my daughter to deposit any money that might come in (through the mail or through garage sales, etc.) I was thinking perhaps she made some deposits somehow.
With a little cash and a vending machine nearby, I decided to get some bottled water and a little something to eat. Oh how wonderful! I was thinking. As I went downstairs to find a place to sit and wait until 3 a.m., I saw a bench with an older man sitting and a sort-of sick young man near him. They seem friendly enough and without another bench in sight, the older man motioned me over to join him. We visited a bit and then the man suggested sharing food. We all pitched in what we had, which wasn’t much, but together it was more than enough. For some reason I wasn’t really very hungry. I had gone about 15 days without food or water and probably wouldn’t have believed it, had I not lived it. Wild!
The older man was a retired professor from the university and spoke 5 languages. He was very nice, smart and helpful. The younger 20 yr old boy was obviously not well and kept to himself and was quiet. We shared some of our story and soon it was time to figure out what to do about how and where to sleep.
The older man started to tell me about a trick he had learned sleeping on hard surfaces, then out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a cleaning woman way down the hall. He stopped talking and got up and hurried down the hall to where she was working. As he was returning to where I was, he was now carrying some cardboard and he was beaming! With a great big smile, he showed up and explained that the secret to a good night’s rest is cardboard! So he helped me and the young man find a spot out of the way, sort of in a corner, laid down the cardboard and I put my blanket over it. I was so exhausted, I was ready to sleep ‘forever’, I thought, but before I did, I asked my Angels to be sure to wait me up in time to be at the airport counter on time. As it was, I was on the second floor, overlooking the ticket counter on the first floor below me. It was a very large, quiet, empty place for now.
Early in the morning I woke-up. I was surprised I slept, the lights burned brightly all night and even now they are shining in my eyes. I’m also realizing suddenly that the empty building and hallways of last night have been transformed and now are full of people! They seem all nicely dressed and in a hurry to the appropriate airport terminal for their reservations. I then, quickly roll up my blanket and tidy up the area where I was sleeping. The older and younger man of the night before have already left, I have no idea when.
I now was worried that I might not recognize Jesus, of the airline office, in the morning and maybe it was really all just a dream. As I turned around from my sleeping place to look at the airport ticket counter below, I couldn’t believe my eyes! There were hundreds and hundreds of people there! All packed in like sardines together! And very noisy! “How in the world am I going to find Jesus?” I thought. I wasn’t even sure now, what he looked liked. I put on my backpack and slowly started to descend the stairs at around 3 a.m. toward the airline reservation counter. Much to my surprise, as I was noticing the people behind the reservation desk, I thought I recognized Jesus. Unlike the other workers, who were in uniform, he was not; and yet, every employee seemed to be at his beck and call and was listening to even his slightest command. He then, happened, to look up as I finished coming down the stairs, just before I joined the huge mass of people standing in line. “No, no, Mary, don’t get in line, come up here! I got your ticket! It all worked out! You are on the next flight! Come here, come quickly, come right up here!” He was talking very loud so I could hear him over the hundreds of people in line and waiving his arm back in forth, high in the air. “Wow!” Music to my ears! I didn’t have to worry about finding Jesus. It turned out he found me! And also, I now realized he had to be the top, top manager of the airline here. What a wonderful surprise! A great Christmas gift! I’m coming home for Christmas after all. Also, what an incredible manager Jesus was, to work so late at night on Christmas Eve, sending all the employees home to enjoy their holiday; and yet, here he is again, bright and early to put in probably another very full day!
Jesus took care of me at the counter, right away! I still had time to contact my daughter and talk a bit. She got all the details about picking me up at the airport and she let me know that she had found help to drive there too. I then asked her about my checking account and if she had sold anything and deposited the money into the account and she said no… “No”, she didn’t make any deposits. Hmm…
The flight was pleasant and I was held in a state of grace the whole trip back home. When I arrived at the Sacramento airport, I had just one request from my daughter, if she had the money, could she please buy me a hot cinnamon roll? “Yes, indeed!” And it was wonderful! Probably crazy, since I have really cleaned out my body from a lot of toxin during the fast, but it was what I wanted and I really enjoyed it!
We then returned to Nevada City, safe and sound, as I drove us back. I had offered to drop off her boyfriend (who helped drive) before or after I got home; but I gave them the choice. My daughter wanted to continue to drive my car and take him home after dropping me off, so I said ok. I was home! It was wonderful! However, it was cold and snowing in Nevada City; and I was still in my summer, Cancun outfit wearing sandals. I was in the house only a few minutes, without the time to even change clothes, when the phone rang. It was my daughter crying: “Mom, I am so sorry, I’ve had an accident and they say the SUV is totaled!” “What?” I asked in disbelief. “I was driving back to the house after dropping off my boyfriend and there was a sudden snow storm and I lost control of the car on the ice, I crashed into someone’s yard and rolled the SUV.” “Are you OK?” I asked. “Yes, a few bruises and knocks, but mostly I think I’m ok”. “They say the car is totaled!” She said. I said; “Well honey, that doesn’t matter, what matters is that you are ok. Where are you? So I can come and get you?” and the rest was routine.
As I hung up the phone, in that moment, I received a flash of awareness and insight from my Spirit. Again, I could feel myself held in a higher consciousness and knew that this accident was a physical manifestation of a reflection of the change I made in myself. My house, like my car represents an extension of my physical body. In Mexico, I had gone though a great transformation. On the physical plane, by my SUV getting ‘totaled’; it represented to me that my old body (my old consciousness) had gone through a total death and rebirth as well. Through the mercy of Spirit and the Trust and Faith I was able to demonstrate in Mexico; instead of me (my physical body) having to experience a tragic physical accident; it was my car that got totaled. My daughter was basically unhurt and my insurance covered the car replacement.
Regarding the money in my apparently ‘magic’ checking account, I found out by fasting, I was shifted into to a higher vibration (or dimension) and the processing of the money withdrawals, via the banks, was in a different time-sequence (reality) than that of my vibration. The withdrawals would show up eventually; but only after a while, after I ate more food and grounded back in at home and my vibration returned to that of the 3D, mass consciousness of this world and that of the banks. The withdraws did showed up a couple of months later. It wasn’t magic, it was physics, I discovered. Later, I counted out during the trip I had made a total of five $100.00 withdrawals and even now, upon my return, the bank still said I had a $100.17 balance. Of course as I ate and grounded in, that changed and I returned to the logical, sequential time reality that we are all use to in this 3rd dimensional reality.
( I believe that with Mother Mary’s help in resetting the banking system, that also helped create this to happen.)
Later that evening, as things settled down, we had a nice Christmas Day together; later, I went into my bedroom, sat down and looked into the mirror and talked to Spirit: “Ok, God, Mother Mary, Jesus, after everything that has happened on this trip and living the unbelievable; I’m yours. I can’t go back to my regular life anymore. So, please just show me how and what I need to do”.
( It was this journey and others that I made, that later gave me the clarity, that by raising my vibration, via: ‘The Big Seven’ (fasting, prayer, silence, mediation, being in nature, movement and focused on the God within), and God helped magnetizing my own energy back to myself that I had left on this Earthly plane from the many past/concurrent incarnations I had here. I realized that, energetically only ‘I’, can do this for myself. It has to be a vibrational match to the same being/soul group of the energy left behind to bring completion and wholeness back to oneself. Thank you God, Jesus and Mary for your help! I couldn’t have done it without you! What a partnership!)
As it turned out, everything was up for sale back home; eventually mostly everything sold upon my return, or I gave it away, or I put it in storage. I even received more money for the car through insurance than I would have, had I sold it directly. I knew now, for me, it was all about of letting go and letting God now lead the way. I now just need to hopefully understand and follow guidance (smile).
With all my gratitude and love…
Living on God’s Loving Light
What if you woke up one day and fully realized that you had done it all? Everything. Had every occupation, every experience, even creating this experience? That you could chose to have any aspect of yourself come into your body and do, what you might not think you can currently do, just by asking, via thought, to God?
After sorting through my feeling regarding this; I decided then, that there is only one thing left to experience on this Earthly plane, an intense, loving relationship with God. God in me. I know God’s Loving Light is the source of my energy! Physical food is optional.
How best to connect with God, since God is everywhere and in everything? No sooner asked then answered: I was reminded of a childhood experience (at about 8 yrs old), when God had me reaffirm out loud to myself: “I know these people think they are my parents, and they are nice enough people, but I know ‘You’ are really my parents.” As I looked at the thick, white mist swirling around my head in the bathroom, gazing into the mirror….”Whoever you are…?” Then in that moment, I remembered God and where I came from (Source). I was devastated that I could have forgotten God!
The inner conversation continued and I was guided to now say this out loud: “Ok, ok, I’ll say it out loud if you want me too: I know we don’t have to eat, drink, sleep or even breathe, and we certainly don’t have to get sick and die; but, they believe that here, so we do.”
After a few more conversations with ‘God’; I was told my life would change around the year 2000… and it did… I woke up!
Physically, I had an intense body cleansing by Spirit. I essentially had a severe, 4-day flu, every week for 4 months. When that was finished, I was aware of most all of my extra-sensory abilities and could utilize them. Thus, my association of intensely experiencing ‘God in me’; via my favorite tools as I know them: Prayer (intention), Fasting from physical food (but living on Light), Meditation, Silence, being in Nature, physical Movement and best of all, focusing on the loving God-within. Learning to have love, compassion and self-acceptance of myself and finding balance in my Heart with all parts/aspects of me.
I know God/Spirit beats my heart and breaths my body; God’s Grace. I know I don’t want anything to come between me and God, no deviations. The intensity of that bond is “My daily bread” and sustains me. Jesus, Mother Mary and St. Germain are all part of my Spiritual Team and various Guides helping me every step of the way and still are always with me, as are other Ascended Masters, Saints, Sages and Enlightened Ones.
My new God-job looks like ‘Being’, i.e.: Living very simply, in peace, listening-silence, flowing with The Field, knowing that Source is the provider of my needs, wants and desires. I believe and have witnessed miracles; but also realize that miracles are the physical manifestations of God’s Grace and utilization of the Universal Laws.
I traveled many places around the world since 2001 (17 yrs) and I discovered that this life-style, without eating much physical food, being close to God suited me. Late in 2004, my Spirit and Guides had me return to the U.S. after a 3 mo. trip to Asia. At that point, I felt I had hit an energetic wall…hard! I questioned Spirit and asked: “Why I was here, back in the U.S.? Why not stay in Asia where the people are more open to these ideas?” But my Spirit told me that my work was here. “Bring the teachings of the East to the West.” So, now it has been my life to live my truth here in the U.S. as best I can. During my world travels, I went to ancient places and knew my former self as an Immortal Being, living on God’s Love and Light. I know that is what the true Garden of Eden is. Full awareness of God in Self (and others).
My guides told me that I am a Solarian (Soul-Air-I-Am). It may look like a Breatharian, living on air/light or etheric energy; but, that is not my focus. Awareness and insights are a byproduct of my focus. My focus is God-Mother-Heart-Body union. Just like cellular rejuvenation, regeneration, health, immortality, and other etheric abilities that are revealed along this path… these are all byproducts of my electro-magnetic, 4 body (Spirit, Mind, Heart and Body ) God-Union; embodying my Soul and Divine Plan for the benefit of Self and All.
Blessings of Peace,